Free Erotic Stories

My wife Liz works part-time in the morning and she recently started an unusual at-home business to make extra money. We have a few friends who always complain that they do not get enough sex in their marriages. As a joke one time, my wife asked one of them that if he wanted, she would jack him off in exchange for a small fee to help ease his sexual frustration. He surprisingly agreed and we thought it would be an isolated incident. But word of mouth spread and soon she had several regular customers each week.

Basically one our friends or co-workers would come over in the afternoon and my wife would lead them into our rather large bedroom. I would also come into the bedroom but I would sit in the far corner at a desk. My wife would lead the buy over to the bed and ask him to strip down completely and lie on the bed. My wife would usually wear some tight panties and usually a snug see-through bra that showed a lot of cleavage to enhance the fantasy. Liz would always close the curtains that are around the bed so I could not see, but I could still hear what was going on. After he handed her the money (the going rate was about $50), she would ask him to put his hands behind his head and she would rub his cock down until he shot his load. During this time they both would casually chat and my wife would even talk dirty if he wanted that. Liz never let it go further than that even though several may have wanted that.
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On our recent trip back from New York, we were getting horny thinking about some time alone just the two of us in the motel room we had booked. We had been crammed together with a bunch of relatives while staying upstate and were looking forward to some loud hot sex.

“It will be nice to be able to let loose and make some noise.” Deb said

“Yeah. I was getting tired of having to cover your mouth so your moans wouldn’t be heard by everyone else I the house,” I said laughingly.

“I’m Really horny! I don’t think I can wait another 2 hours till we get to the hotel.” She said as she squeezed her thighs together her hand buried between her legs.

“Well, we can make a quick rest stop and at this time of night if were lucky I can sneak you into the men’s room stall.”

I really didn’t think she’d go for it. Deb was always worried about getting caught but if she gets going she’s one of the hottest sluts I’ve ever known.

After a moments hesitation she got this mischievous look in her eye and said, “OK. Lets do it.”
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My buddy Aaron called me up last Friday night and asked if my wife and I would like to hang out. He said he wanted to check out a new martini bar located down town and that he wanted to hang out at his place first. He mentioned that it was an upscale bar so to dress accordingly. I knew that Aaron had a thing for Beth and this would be a good opportunity for him to flirt with her and get a real good look at her all dressed up.

I put on a sports coat and looked pretty sharp but Beth looked amazing in the new dress that I had just bought her. She had her hair done up real nice with her nice makeup on and all of her fanciest jewelry on display. She just looked so hot! Beth was very excited as we don’t really get out on the town much, she had been begging me to take her out and I thought it was going to be a great night. On the way over to Aaron’s place, Beth asked what the plan was going to be. I told her that Aaron wanted to hang out at his place and then we would go out afterwards.

Well when we got up to the steps at Aaron’s house, I knocked on the door and our jaws dropped as we found out what Aaron had meant when he said he wanted to “hang out.” When the door swung open, Aaron was standing there buck naked, his huge cock just swinging around in our faces. Beth made some gasping sounds and just stared in awe as she uttered the words, “Oh my god.” Aaron said “Hey, good to see you two, c’mon in.”
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I met Kathy at a college football game. Beth, a mutual friend who worked with Kathy, introduced us. Beth is a buxom brunette with a great face and smile. She stands a well endowed 5’6″, 130 pounds, with a tight little behind. Kathy on the other hand, has light brown hair, almost strawberry blond. She also has a great face, but smaller breasts and a great butt.

Beth had been married for a few years before Kathy and I were married, but her husband was a gambler and a philanderer. It was only a matter of time before they divorced and the end came sooner, rather than later. This story happened after they had been divorced about 18 months.

Kathy approached me one night after a wild night of love. “I have to ask you a favor.”

“Anything love.”

“It involves Beth.” I expected Kathy to ask for me to hook up Beth with a friend, as she seemed a little down after the divorce. She had gone through two loser boyfriends quickly and I had several available friends. “Beth wants to have a baby before it gets too late.”

“Beth is only 28, she has plenty of time,” I said.

“She wants you to father her child.” Read the rest of this erotic story

Elizabeth was an actress and always trying out for new roles. Robert hadn’t realised that this role transformed her into a “knockout”.

“Wow, sweetheart! You look incredible!” Robert’s jaw had almost dropped to the floor once he saw his beautiful young wife emerge from the bedroom. Robert had never seen Elizabeth dressed in something so tight and skimpy before – except before or during their lovemaking sessions. But this time it was different, because Robert knew that his 25-year-old wife would soon go out into public in that very provocative and sexy outfit. “Thanks,” Elizabeth smiled in return. She did a pirouette and added, “I’m glad you like it.” “Like it?” Robert gushed. “I LOVE IT!”

Elizabeth’s outfit consisted mostly of an aqua-colored top and matching short-skirt, both of which were made of a very thin, stretchy material. Needless to say, the aqua-colored outfit displayed the considerable and luscious curves of her 38d-24-35 figure. Since the top was cut low, it displayed a generous amount of Elizabeth’s ample cleavage. Her breasts were very large and firm, without any sag or give in them. Just like the top, the short-skirt fit Elizabeth’s body like a tight glove. It went down to the mid-point between her hips and knees, and offered a wonderful view of her richly-tanned long legs. To complete the outfit, the beautiful young lady wore a pair of white high-heeled shoes which accentuated her firm, long legs even more. Elizabeth had long, stylish blonde hair which went down to the center of her back. Even without smiling, there was no argument that Elizabeth had a beautiful face. But she looked even more appealing when she smiled. Since Elizabeth was a warm and pleasant person, the 25-year-old woman usually had a happy expression upon her lovely face.
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I had a fantasy about having sex in a taxi with my wife, showing off her body and getting the driver so turned-on that he would jack off so she could watch it, and I’d get even more turned-on knowing she was so hot. I finally one day after many weeks of replaying that fantasy in my head I set it up with a cab driver I’d used earlier in the day to come home from the airport, it would be when we went out of town over that weekend.

It happened like this, there were some taxis parked outside of our hotel so I slipped outside and asked one driver, a large older black fellow, (The one we’d used to get to the hotel) how much it would cost to drive us around sight seeing for 45 minutes. He said $50.00.

I told him what I had in mind, and he said, “As long as I gets my money I didn’t care what you do to your wife.” I told him there would be an extra $50.00 in it for him if he would jack off in front of my wife. He said he had no problem with that.

I told my wife we were finally going to take that “special” taxi ride we’ve talked about. Of course she tried to back out, but finally after a lot of convincing she got dressed up in a short skirt and flimsy blouse. I knew she wanted this as badly as me; she just couldn’t make herself say it.
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Trembling and trying to control my shallow breathing, I picked up the pay phone in the grocery store and proceeded to check the number held loosely in my right hand. “It’s easy,” I thought to myself, “just act cool.”. I had been flipping this business card around in my pocket all day, in fact, for the last seven days since I received it.

That night started horribly with a fight with my wife. In anger I went out to find somewhere to get drunk. I needed a drink badly and anywhere would do. I managed to find a pub in a strip mall about twenty minutes from home.

“Here alone?” I turned towards the voice. She stood next to me with a twenty dollar bill in one hand and a cigarette in the other. Curly brown hair framed her pale face, the most beautiful chestnut eyes I had ever seen, both complimenting her outstanding body. Her top giving a generous view of her breasts, her desiner jeans giving way to her firm stomach. The woman was built for business.
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I’m 24 and Ron’s 32. We’ve been married three years, and our sex life is fabulous. Ron really likes me to show off my body, especially my chest, to other men. A couple of weeks ago, we went to my best friend Marie’s house. She and her husband Alan were throwing a party Saturday night, and we decided to make it a weekend trip. Ron and I arrived after dinner on Friday night, and the two of us relaxed around the kitchen table, playing cards and drinking beer.

When playing cards got boring, Marie put some music on and we began to dance while our husbands looked on. During the second or third song, Ron motioned for me to unbutton some of the buttons on my blouse. I unbuttoned the top three buttons, giving the guys a nice view, since I wasn’t wearing a bra. Then a slow song came on and Ron danced with me and Alan with Marie. While Ron and I were dancing, he unbuttoned another two buttons, so now my blouse was unbuttoned to below my tits.
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Hi, My name is Jenny. I just have to tell someone the story about what happened that got me so hot, that I continue to try to act this out whenever I can. It happened 4 years ago, when I was just a 19 year old newly-wed.

I’ve been told that I have a perfect body for cock teasing. It just doesn’t occur to me to walk or stand any differently, but guys of all ages react the same way whenever they see me. I like knowing that they are looking at me and thinking about how I would look naked. I always enjoyed the attention, but until this incident I had never gone past the teasing stage. I had been faithful to my husband. At the time this happened, my husband Jake was 24 years old. He was the only man I had ever been with sexually. He fucked me on our third date and I fell in love with him immediately.

For a year or so, our sex life was very good. Jake would always tell me I was lucky to have a husband with a huge cock. I assumed his was bigger than normal. I still enjoyed the fact that other men would look at me, even when I was out with Jake. They’d try to hide their interest but it was obvious to me, though Jake just laughed it off.
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I’ve lead a pretty normal life as a receptionist at a dentist’s office, but that all changed on my 33rd Birthday.

I was supposed to pick my husband up after dinner and had plans to take him to a fancy restaurant and seduce him when we got home. I was wearing a new red dress that I just knew would knock him out. He keeps on telling me to show myself off more and not dress like an old maid. Well…this dress showed off. It was so short that I had to keep reminding myself not to bend over and to keep my knees in tight while walking or it would ride-up and show off the garter belt and tiny pink panties that I was wearing.

I was waiting in the lobby at my husband’s office when he and his coworkers arrived all at once. A couple of the guys whistled when they saw me…all of them were staring. I hadn’t counted on this…I thought it would just be Vic (my husband). To make matters worse they invited us out for a drink and Vic obviously wanted to go along. So I told them “OK…but just for one drink.”

We walked over to this little bar a couple of blocks away. I kept having to pull down on the hem of my dress to keep it from sliding up as I walked. When we finally got to the bar, they sat me in the middle of a big ‘U’ shaped booth, the head of the table…’since it was my birthday’. Vic took everyone’s order and went to the bar for what seemed like a long time. While he was gone all the attention at the table was on me. The guys all wanted to know where I worked, what I did, what my interests were… It was all very flattering. Many of the guys were leering the tight top of my dress. The dress buttoned clear up to my neck, but it was tight on top and the buttons were a little strained at the bust. It was intended to get my husband’s attention at dinner, and it was obviously getting the attention of these guys.
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My wife and I joined a couple for a night of drinking and cards. My wife is in her late 20′s, about 5’3″ and 125 pounds of exquisite flesh. She has large tits with nipples that can stick out about a quarter inch. We went to visit Carl and Kathy, who are very close. Kathy is only 23 and is short and slight. She has a blond pixie haircut and her small titties compliment her 100 pound frame.

We sat down to play a game of spades with Kathy being my partner. The rule was, whoever lost a hand, that team had to do a shot of Tequila. It didn’t take long before everyone was feeling good and a bit warm. The girls started to object the continuation of shots, so we suggested that a piece of clothing could be discarded as substitute. Everyone agreed and I have to admit, I didn’t mind losing that often because as I did…so did Kathy.

The first moment of truth came to my wife (Sandy). Everyone was down to two articles and Carl took off his shirt. Sandy had to take off her bra. She hemmed and hawed and finally released her fantastic globes. Carl couldn’t close his mouth, he kept staring. Things progressed and finally Kathy exposed her cute titties. A perfect mouth full. She also had a perfectly trimmed blond bush.
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I still can’t believe the time I had last night. It’s now Sunday morning and the sun has been up for a couple of hours. My wife Beverly and I just said goodbye to our new friends Theresa and Craig. The four of us had the time of our lives last night, an experience that none of us will soon forget. To help remember I decided to write down how our evening transpired. Here is the story of what happened.

Bev and I had heard about this nice old bar in a neighboring town from friends. The place was old but nicely maintained. We called ahead and reserved one of the apartments upstairs so that we could have our fill of fun and then crash without the hassles of driving home. We arrived early Saturday evening and checked into the apartment. The place was not the Ritz but it wasn’t too bad. It would serve its purpose well enough.

After changing clothes, we headed down to the bar. Bev wore jeans, a nice snug fitting top and her denim vest. She looked quite sexy and generated a number of looks as she entered the bar. The place featured Country and Western music and the party had already started. Bev and I sat down and ordered a drink. I was ready for the dance floor so I dragged Bev out of her seat for a dance. She’s not crazy about dancing but obliged me anyway. After a couple of upbeat songs we sat down to rest and finish our drink.
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A bored young couple search for a way to spice things up, but will they like what they find? [ Story by Jason Martin - pongo_martin@hotmail.com ]

My husband John and I have been married for 5 years and although we love each other dearly, we both had to admit that our sex life had cooled off somewhat lately.

We tried the usual stuff to spice things up; romantic weekends away, candle lit dinners, but nothing ever seemed to recapture the old magic. I began to resign myself to a life of mediocre sex, which to say the least, was mildly depressing.

It was John that first suggested we try and make things interesting in the bedroom by adding a third person. “You know, like a threesome.” he said enthusiastically. Needless to say I was shocked, but what surprised more was when he mentioned he wanted it to be with another a guy rather than a woman. He confessed that it had always been a secret fantasy of his to watch me with another man.
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Karen came to stay with us when she and her husband Eric were getting divorced. Eric had begun drinking soon after they married and had soon become more interested in his beer than his wife. Needless to say it was a bad time for her. My wife and I wanted to help her get back on her feet so we offered to let her stay as long as she liked.

Karen was my wife’s sister, a petite blonde with smallish breasts but a tight little butt that filled out blue jeans deliciously. She was so different from Mary, my wife of seven years, who had large beautiful breasts and perhaps a little too much ass. Karen also had far different sexual needs than my wife.

Mary wanted sex three or four times a month which often left me in the bathroom with a dirty magazine and a tired arm. Karen, so Mary told me, wanted sex with Eric every night. Often while I was taking care of business in the bathroom I would fantasize about Karen and how good it would be to have a wife who wanted sex as often as I did.

About two months after Karen moved in with us she started flirting with me. Teasing me about being almost as hard up as she was, and wearing tight jeans and wiggling a little extra when I was around. Mary noticed it too and mentioned it to me a couple of times saying that Karen was a hot bitch and she thought Karen was after me. I usually just said I hadn’t noticed.
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Christine walked through the door home from a long day at work just in time to hear the phone ring. “I wonder who that could be,” she thought as she hurried to the phone.

“Hello,” the beautiful young wife said.

“Hi Christine,” returned a male voice.

Christine said pleasantly, “Oh hi Bob. I’m afraid Jim isn’t here. Tonight he has class.” Bob was a friend of Christine’s husband and was a real estate broker.

Bob replied, “That’s OK Christine. Actually, it was you that I wanted to talk to.”

Bob had been after Christine to help him show property for some time. Bob knew from watching other female agents that Christine had the potential to be a good agent. She was young, only 26 years old and a bit shy but she had a pleasant personality. The thing that convinced Bob of her potential was her looks. Christine was a very attractive woman. Bob just knew that she could charm the socks off any prospective male buyer. She stood 5’4″ with gorgeous legs and a 38DD-26-38 figure. Her reddish brown hair framed a beautiful face and hazel eyes. So far Bob had been unable to interest Christine in changing careers.

Bob continued, “Listen, I have an opportunity for you and I think you’ll like it.”

“You want me to show a house,” guessed Christine.
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After a year of hard work my project was finally finished. It was time for a vacation. Fortunately, the school year was ending and my wife Brenda would be rapping up her teaching duties in the next day or two. She had let me know a month earlier that she was ready for a little time off.

I made arrangements for two nights at a hotel in a nearby large city. I figured we would site see during the day and check out the night life at night. I told Brenda about my plans and she was thrilled.

Three days later we hopped into the car and took off. We spent the first day and night checking out the city as planned. We were so tired after all the days’ activities that we went straight to bed. I was a little disappointed that we hadn’t reserved the energy necessary to make love before retiring. I vowed that the next night would be different. I had plans and a surprise for my beautiful wife.

We slept late the next morning. We dressed, had brunch then resumed our tour of the city. Just before dark we had dinner at a nice restaurant. During the meal I told Brenda that I had a surprise for her back in the room. She begged me to tell her what it was but I told her it would wait until after dinner. It became a race to see who would finish first. She won. As we waited for the check she became annoyed at the waiter’s slowness. He wasn’t really slow but to Brenda it seemed that way. She was definitely very excited about the surprise.
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I’m currently a freshman at a large southern university. I’d like to tell you about an experience that happened to me the first week I was on campus. It was my first Friday night on my own and I had been invited to a fraternity party. Before I go on, let me describe myself a bit. I’m 18, about six-foot tall, and weigh 180 pounds. Many women have called me good-looking, but I’d say my best feature is my average length but extremely thick cock.

I arrived at the party at about ten o’clock. I immediately filled my beer mug and went in search of females. I’m used to parties where guys outnumber girls by a ratio of two to one, and you have to fight for a piece of ass. This party was totally different–there were plenty of females, and they were all hot. After checking out the scene, I decided to concentrate on Sara, a voluptuous blonde about five and a half feet tall, 110 pounds, with about 36-inch tits. She was dressed in a denim micro skirt that left almost nothing to the imagination. On top of that she wore a very clingy white blouse. After the usual eye contact, flirting, and small talk, we knew that we both wanted each other. I suggested that we go back to my dorm room to continue our conversation.
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“Thank goodness its Friday,” said Mary.

“You got that right,” added Kevin.

Mary and Kevin were on their way to dinner and then to a movie. They both had had a grueling week and looked forward to a relaxing evening out. It was July, it was hot and Kevin had begun to perspire. As Kevin fiddled with the truck’s air conditioner Mary went down a mental list of restaurants that the couple liked.

Kevin couldn’t help noticing Mary’s sexy legs as he adjusted the air. They were covered by a pair of black thigh high stockings. Kevin also noticed that Mary was wearing a new pair of black high heel shoes with the new flair styled heel. He had noticed earlier when they left the house that her five foot three inch frame seemed to be three or four inches taller than usual. Very sexy he thought. The rest of her outfit wasn’t bad either. A mid thigh length black wrap around skirt just barely hid Mary’s stocking tops. Her red silk blouse fit her figure nicely and he liked the way her lovely breasts pushed against the shiny material. Mary had obviously spent some extra time on her shoulder length brown hair and her makeup added a touch of sensuality to her pretty face. Kevin was very proud of Mary. He loved to go out and show off his beautiful wife.

“KEVIN, WATCH OUT,” yelled Mary.

Kevin looked up in time to see a car stopped in the road signaling for a left turn. He slammed on the brakes but it was too late.

BANG!!!!

“SONOFABITCH,” bellowed Kevin. Kevin looked over the hood of his truck at the back of an old Caddy. He realized that he had lingered on Mary’s exquisite body too long and hadn’t been paying attention to the road. The collision had been hard but it didn’t appear to be too serious. Thankfully, they were wearing their seat belts. Kevin looked at Mary and said, “Are you OK, Mary?”
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Hi. My name is Mona – I’m 28, single, and I own a house. Just got it 2 weeks ago, moved in 2 days ago, and really confronted what it would take to make the payments.

When I first found out I was responsible for the payments, I asked friends to move in. Then my sister and brothers, but all declined. I broke down the other day and put an ad in the paper for roommates. I’m not concerned if they are male or female, just as long as they pay the rent and don’t destroy the house.

The ad had run two days when I got my first call, Dean. He said he is 23, in his last year of college and wants out of the dorms. I asked if an hour was okay and he said sure.
Let me tell you about the house while we wait for him: it’s a 2-story, 6 bedroom, 3 bath. It has a huge downstairs living room and kitchen area, plus a den and a family room. What I love about the house is the back yard. Its got a pool & tons of grass in great shape, you can lay down or walk barefoot on it without fear of bugs and dirt.

Ok, now I guess I should tell you how I came to own the house. About two years ago I was desperate for money and I did some escorting for about six months. One “client” was a newly divorced man who had a thing for fast sex: he loved to see how fast he could make me come. It was truly a game for him (he even had a stop watch). Well, three months ago I get a call from some lawyer telling me that he died and I had been willed his house and to come in for the reading. I went down the next week, heard the reading, signed a lot of papers and received the key. He died in a car accident on his way home from the local nudie bar. Driving too fast for the slick roads and slid into a tree. Since he was divorced already, I have no fear of his ex-wife claiming it as community property like wives can in California.
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Mike was late and Vicki was beginning to get angry. Vicki’s husband had told her not to be late and now he was thirty minutes past due. Vicki tried to think of where Mike might be. He had gone over to a friend’s house that afternoon and was supposed to meet Vicki at the club at eight. She had called home and there was no answer. Vicki decided to sit at the bar for another ten minutes. If Mike didn’t show she would head home.

Just as Vicki was about to ease off the bar stool and leave, she heard a man say, “Hi, can I buy you a drink?” She looked and found his eyes looking straight at her.

Vicki blushed as he took in her long silky legs and curvy figure. She smiled and said, “Thank you, but… I was just about to leave.”

The handsome man said, “Please don’t leave. I was hoping to find a beautiful woman to talk to and if you go I’ll miss my chance.” His smile was magnetic.

Vicki wanted to leave but she hesitated. She said, “Now come on. This place is full of beautiful women.”

The man didn’t take his eyes off Vicki as he said, “What other women?” He was certainly charming but Vicki had been waiting for her husband and now that he had stood her up she just wanted to go home.
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My name is Bob and I’m a 23-year old Navy clerk, stationed in San Diego. I’ve been married for two years to a “native” San Diego girl, Donna, who is 21. Donna is the epitome of the “California girl.” At 5 foot 5, she weighs about 120 pounds, has light- brown hair, and a real nice figure that has been appreciated by many of my Navy buddies.

It all started very innocently about 18 months ago, after I returned from a cruise. We had only been married a few months prior to my leaving and I was horny as hell when Donna met me at the docks after the ship landed. Some buddies of mine were walking by and gave us a few “words of encouragement” Donna asked me if I would like to have the guys over some evening for drinks and dinner. I asked two of the guys if they would like to stop over the next night, and we set the time at 7:00 PM.

The next night while I made the salad, Donna showered and got dressed. When she came out of the bedroom, she was beautiful! She had on a white see-through blouse over a small black bra, tight red shorts, and strappy white heels. I whistled appreciatively and asked, “What’s the occasion?”
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What a glorious day. I was walking down the beach about twenty yards behind three gorgeous babes. Brian, Dave and I had been following these prime specimens of femininity for over an hour. We kept our distance. Soon we would catch up to them, but we were having too much fun watching their swaying butts set the hook. I know that sounds strange, but if you had seen all those necks snapping you would have been convinced that a hook was doing the job.

“The bait?” you ask. How about a blond, brunette and a redhead. Each one with a body that would arouse a dead man. The blond had on a red two piece suit. She had an ass that just screams, “Squeeze me.” Her shape measured 34C-21-34 and she was the tallest of the three.

The brunette had an awesome set of tits. The bikini top she was wearing struggled valiantly to keep them covered no thanks to her pronounced strut. The brunette’s white suit was easily the most provocative suit on the beach or maybe it was just the incredible 34D-22-33 body that it covered.

Finally the redhead, or more accurately the strawberry blond, strutted her fantastic 38D-24-36 assets in a shiny silvery blue two piece suit. I swear it looked like her headlights were chrome plated.
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Mike is somewhat shy and quiet. He is married to Betty, a vivacious outgoing girl who likes to flirt with other men. When they go to parties together, Mike usually winds up being something of a wallflower while Betty disappears into the crowd.

Mike was actually enjoying himself. He couldn’t believe it. Normally, he didn’t particularly like parties. He went because his pretty wife liked to go,and he usually wound up in a small group talking while his wife disappeared on the dance floor. But tonight Mike was enjoying himself. He was dancing with the hostess, June and He was enjoying every move they made together in the crowded den. He caught sight of his wife across the crowded room dancing with June’s husband. Even seeing the way she was molding her body to her partner’s didn’t upset him tonight. He had long ago concluded his very attractive wife was a cockteaser. It didn’t bother him because June’s body was glued to his.

Mike couldn’t believe how he and June were dancing. She had her face buried against his neck and he could feel her lips sort of nibbling at his throat. Her body was molded to his own and he could feel her ample tits against his chest through the pullover shirt which he wore. He was sure she wasn’t wearing a bra. He had been pretty sure before he danced with her, because he could see her nipples pressing against the soft thin blouse she wore. Now he knew she was braless because he could feel her tits pressing against his chest. He was amazed at the way she was rubbing up against him as they danced! He could feel her pelvis against his thigh. She was actually rubbing her pussy against his leg! And her hip was pressing against his crotch. He knew that his dick was getting hard in his pants as they danced and wondered if she could feel it.
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Claudia Ryan gazed over the sound stage looking in vain for Aldo Marchetti. “Christ, Joan,” Claudia questioned her chief assistant, Joan Walker, “didn’t you tell Harry to make sure that Aldo would be an extra during this shoot!?!” Joan staring at the nearly empty sound stage herself replied quickly, “Of course I did, I practically made Harry sign a blood oath that he would have Aldo here for the entire shoot, I have no idea where he is!” “Goddam it,” spat Claudia, “get Harry on the fucking phone and find out for me, I’m not gonna do one scene until he’s here, got it!?!” Joan nodded her head and made a beeline for the phone back in Claudia Ryan’s trailer, and while it was only eight in the morning Claudia had already given her a splitting headache! “Do this, do that,” she thought grimly, “why can’t the old bat do something on her own for a change, you’d think her leg was broken by the way she acted!” Joan dialed Harry’s number, and in a few moments he was on the phone. “Well,” he greeted her warmly, “what can I do for you today, Joan, is the boss acting up again!?!” As executive producer, Harry Berson made just about every major decision connected with the movie, including the hiring of Aldo Marchetti as a personal favor to Claudia Ryan. “Jesus, Harry,” Joan said getting right to the point, “Marchetti’s nowhere to be seen, and Claudia’s throwing a hissy fit, says she won’t do a scene until he shows!!!” Calm down, babe,” Harry replied smoothly, “Marchetti isn’t needed until scene number four, so he won’t be showing up until later this afternoon, no problem, he just won’t be there this morning!” Joan knew that Claudia would be upset over this new bit of news, but thought that if she was assured Aldo would be there later that day she would hopefully do her opening scenes. “Okay, Harry,” Joan sighed, “I’ll try getting her to go ahead, but there are no guarantees!” “You tell Claudia that Marchetti won’t show until scene four is ready to shoot, so the longer she procrastinates, the longer it will be until he gets here,” Harry replied flatly, “so you tell the old bag she’d better get her ass on that stage and knock off those first three scenes, capiche???” “Yeah,” Joan answered tiredly, “capiche.”
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I awoke yesterday morning to the sound of my wife’s voice. Penny was on her way out the door to go to work. Through my sleepy head I heard her say, “Don’t forget Bob, I’m going out with Tina tonight…We’re going directly from work…Your mom will pick up the kids after school.” I cleared my throat and asked, “Where are you going?”. She yelled over her shoulder, “We’ll probably see a movie or something.”

I struggled out of bed, thankful that it was Friday. I showered and dressed and made the kid’s breakfast. After dropping the kids at school, I headed for work. A cup of coffee was the first order of business. I opened the mail next. After the usual solicitations for various items and services, I came across an invitation to a wedding. An old friend of mine, Tom Butler was getting married the following Saturday. A bachelor party was scheduled for the Friday a week before, which was today.

I hadn’t seen Tom in a while so I was looking forward to his party. With Penny out tonight with her friend Tina, I needed to find someone to watch the kids. I called my mother and she agreed to keep the kids overnight. With that settled I began to imagine what this bachelor party might be like. Tom is a pretty wild character. I expected that he would have a pretty wild bachelor party.
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